http://metamorphosinglife.blogspot.com/


Hello Folks!
Hope your 2010 has started off on the right note. I am sorry for the lack of posts / updates what-so-ever!!! Pardon me... but honestly speaking. I have not been tracking, I have been lazy, eating crap ... tried to get back on track, wasn't into it, whatever = Epic Fail! This is really tough admitting it, even if it is online, on a blog. There won't be anymore new posts here. The blog itself will be here as a reminder but still nothing more.

A lot has happened during the winter good and bad. I let myself go. And of course this is not easy to accept that all my previous posts and plannings have been let down. But it's okay. I forgive myself. Why? I came back. And I'm strarting fresh that too, in a new blog. Cause the previous posts are holding me back in a strange way. I am moving my blog ... of course it'll focus on myself getting healthy-loosing weight and choosing the right path. But also choosing to do what is RIGHT for me? I'm 25 years old and I have not done or accomplished much... to be honest if it were possible, my picture would be right beside the word 'pathetic' in a dictionary. No, I'm not being too hard on myself cause I need to wake up and face reality and improve myself inside and out. I have to grow up and improve myself for no one but me! AS A WHOLE ... 2010 is about changing myself to a more responsbile, happy and healthy human-being. How? Well just follow me & find out if this one's gonna be an EPIC WIN!


http://metamorphosinglife.blogspot.com/

WI - 12, 13 & 14

So it's been a while... sorry, for the lack of 'actual' posts. But I've made sure to update my status through the side-bar tools' and of course weight-loss tweets.

I want to keep this short and simple, and will delve into details in another post soon. promise.

WI 12 = I lost -1.2 lbs from my previous week's gain by bringing the scale to 192.2 lbs (Nov. 21.09)

WI 13 = I gained + 1.2 lbs (that I lost the week before...boo!) bringing me back to and 193.4 lbs (Nov. 28.09)

WI 14 = I lost -1 lb in my current weigh-in on (Dec. 5. 09) which brings me to 192.4 lbs.

I was happy to see the loss in my last w-i; however, I feel like a yo-yo ...being tugged back and forth within the 90's range. I really want to get out of it but it appears to be difficult. But I am aware of the obstacles towards my goals. Simply put, mainly the lack of physical exercise (and kinda' over-doing it during wknds). Thankfully last weekend was better along with the rest of week. This wknd was okay too... of course a bit of sweet and more but not so bad (i think, i hope). LOL.... well let's see how it goes. I am not rushing myself...but I would love to be out of the 90's by late December '09. PLEASE! shout out to myself...my lazy-arse!!!

Good luck to all...hope ur w-in's going better. I am not putting any pressure on myself. Just trying to make healthier choices no matter what. Cheers :D

WI - 11

Just had my weigh-in ...and taaa daaaa I gained +1 lb, which brings me to 193.4 lbs! Unlike my hopes to loose or get out of the 190's ...i guess I'll be stickin' around a lil' longer. hmmm... who is to blame? Perhaps me, my lack of physical activity, the very fact that I go to bed sooo late and wake up even later in the morning. So ya, it sucks! But I shall try not to let it spoil my satty day; and, as for the rest of week ... i shall take it as a challenge!!! :D

ps. dunno why, in a strange way today ...before i got up on that scale, I had a feeling, the numbers would go up perhaps. It's not like I went over-board with crazy food but I guess I did eat a lil' n thr but i did track! ...don't really know! o_0 aaa shucks!

"A strong positive attitude will create more miracles than any wonder drug."

Hope the rest of u have a great wk. Good Luck to all!
yours truly ~

I'll be myself soon!

WI-10

I lost -1.6 lbs on Saturday (November 7.'09), bringing me to 192.4 lbs!!! :) YAY! I was happy to see the scale. I haven't been to the gym though (i think it's been 2 weeks since). But that isn't the secret to my loss or breaking of the plateau ... i have been tracking everything, and eating within my daily points target limit (actually i've been going a little off but choosing healthy stuff instead) plus i think the lack of over-the-top strength-training.

It was that 'TOM' so I was a lil' apprehensive to get up on that scale but to my pleasent surprise I did loose a good number. It was STILL in the solids and that made me a happy camper. I've been feeling lazy lately (in matters of physical activities). I should at least go out for brisk-walks if not the gym but I have done none. I know the loosing is okay right now but I need to tone myself a little and being active will still make the process faster if not, a tad better to say the least??? It is a lifestyle change after all. Not only should one choose to eat right/healthy but also learn to incorporate a healthy dose of activity to stay fit and fine. Good thing is, I've been drinking a little more 'water' than my normal intakes ...which is a positive change. I go for the water first. I want to hit the gym this week (tomorrow I shall force myself ...will try to get my butt out of the house no matter what). It's so cold so it sucks but I gotta do this. So here's to another week. I want to get out of the "190's" zone actually ... i won't say it'll happen next wk (who knows but I don't wanna pressurize myself). I'll do my bit and only hope for the best.

I don't wanna put any stress on myself anymore. But yes, it will be nice to be out of the 90's :) SOON!
Good luck to everyone ...and here's to another week! Cheers!

I'll be myself soon!

WI - 9

Oh! Let me just say 'YAY'!!! I finally lost in solid digits and that is an absolute YAY factor for me; especially after a difficult last week. Frankly, earlier this week, I didn't bother to stress as much and ate within my points (once or twice went over-board with 2/3 points but in matters of healthy food intake) and tracked on my 'ww' point-tracker :) it felt good. I was a little excited and a little nervous at the same time earlier in the morning today but I told myself... 'whatever!' and stepped on that big-bad scale (didn't bother making as much fuss as I normally do). VOILA! I lost -2.6 lbs which brought me to 194 lbs today :) I am so pleased to see the numbers. After such a long gap I see a solid digit loss. It was a great feeling. And magically the whole day went well too.

Last week the gain brought me down on top of the additional 'personal' arguments and stuff. oh ya just FYI: Everything is quite okay and pretty much back to normal on the personal front. Btw, thanks for all the support (here and on WW board) :)

I am not at all discussing any weight related matters with my dad though. It's better if I don't take his 'two-cents' on the subject, hehe. Best avoided. I am doing my thing, quietly and hopefully, this time with the 'PROPER' help of Weight Watchers, I shall move forward. Frankly, October hasn't been the best month for me, in terms of weight-loss ..it was all in points but today (the end of oct) I was happy to see the scale as I stood there. Halloween isn't a big deal or an issue for me anymore. We live in a condo and not many kids come for trick-or-treating really. And strangely, I don't go berserk over candies much. So no worries in that department. I cross my fingers for a better November though.

Point to be noted: I only did gym once this week ..wasn't really up for it, was busy too. On top of that I did strength-training only once in the beginning of this whole week, which also helped I think. I will be going to the gym more for this coming week but I'll keep the weight-training for only the one day (beginning of the week) and the rest only jog/run/cardio stuff. I wanna see the numbers slide downwards. Only in the later stage will I add on the strength-training to the routine. It'll be more vigorous in order to tone up, but for now, this will be at minimum. I might start up my pilates though, cause it stretches the body and makes one feel good. And this is at home (cause I got the video). Btw, I also added the 'scale tracker' on my side bar (it'll show all the + & - that I had on the scale) will continue on ... as it'll help show my progress in a different way. I like it! A lot of this and that...dos and donts! I just realized one thing. I need to relax and enjoy the journey ..and avoid stressing, simply follow the required steps!

I hope u all had a happy halloween. Wish u a great week ahead!

I'll be mysellf soon.

It's our duty to find something beautiful within life; no matter how slight <3

I need inspiration and motivation ... there are so many things in my life that I've put in the backseat - out of fear, negativity from others, out of sacrifice or simply due to lack of confience or motivation. NO MORE!!! I NEED TO LIVE MY DREAMS... and stop wasting time!
I'll be myself soon!

Christopher Gardner: [to his son] You got a dream, you gotta protect it. People can't do something themselves, they wanna tell you that you can't do it. You want something? Go get it. Period.

WI-8 & MUCH MUCH MORE!!!

Let's get it out ... i weighed in earlier today, when I first stepped on the scale it showed '195.8 lbs' and i was surprised cause it was the same as my last weigh-in, so i got up again and same thing. I got off and waited a while ... and then when i got on, bam! - 196.6 lbs. And after that no matter how many times I got up and down, it stuck at the 196.6 lbs. That ticked me off. I was prepared for not a great loss (due to my strength-training three days in a row earlier this week) but still I was NOT ready to face a gain. I was really sad :( I am very disappointed and kind of discouraged. Yes my clothes feel a little loose, I feel better, but still; I gotta get moving no matter.

And right then from the morning, my whole day didn't really go well (whether be it at work or at home with the family, my dad to be specific). Don't get me wrong, he's a good father but still he knows how to push my buttons and he can be freeeaagin annoying or mean/rude. Whatever! I'll get into that later. So to sum it up... on my way back home after a light dinner at a relative's place ... we were driving through timmy's. I ordered myself a small ice-cap (once a week pleasure after my weigh-in during the wknd btw) and was craving for a choc-chip muffin cause I was a 'good girl' the whole wk, but my dad started making harsh comments. (btw, I hate it when they/'whoever' start acting like they know a lot more about what 'I AM' doing, no matter what, it seriously p*sses me off). On top of that they start interfering and commenting in a negative manner. I even defended myself about how I was following a healthy routine through out the week and I deserved to enjoy a little no matter what. He was telling me what an unhealthy image my body portrayed and eventually, something something led to another and my dad was saying no matter what I can't make a difference, etc..blah blah blah.. i snapped inside though. After a while I remained quiet. I didn't order the muffin anyways, haven't touched the ice-cap (won't tonight). He spoiled it big time. So discouraging and it hurts more than anything.

The little confidence or self-esteem I was building up has been smashed. I won't say for good but it is bruised alright. I feel like a looser, a failure who won't be able to achieve anything, forget the weight-loss goals. I cried a lot too. I'm a looser, a 25 year old who still lives with her parents, who can't drive a car, who hates her fcukin' part-time retail job... can't really make use of the so-called degree and of course a fat ass!!!! GOSH! I am so mean to myself...but it is a reality check! I just took a shower and my head has cooled off. I still feel hurt but no use. I've finally come to change about my lifestyle in terms of making healthier choices, slowly but surely...and; so I've decided that I won't let ANYONE...and I mean ANYONE...ruin it for me. He calls me selfish and all but you know what. ...i always let others get ahead of me, I put them before me; it has happened from childhood until now (no matter where and how). I know it - God knows it. I thought about it and I've made up my mind! I am going to put myself ahead this time. I need to change things around me. I have to stop being heavily dependent on my parents or anyone for that matter. I gotta rely on myself and for that I need to take care of myself. Appreciate myself, Love myself, Respect myself. Cause if I won't; no one else will. I feel a little better after writing this. I don't want to say my parents aren't supportive (especially, my mom is always there for me no matter what)...they are caring and loving (and I still love them). But it seems like, my dad has a dual or sometimes multiple personalities hidden within him...that can be harsh and cut through someone's heart. I won't forgive him for this... at least, not soon.

Well one good came out of this, I was pondering whether to re-joinning 'Weight Watcher's' online or not but after this incident, I was sure of it. I came home, cried my heart out and logged in and made myself an official weight-watchers online member. I want to achieve my goals. This is not for anyone or to prove anything. It's for me, and if that's selfish...be it... the rest can go fcuk themselves. I don't swear much but I'm not in the midst of a happy scenario rite now. After joining WW I realized.. my daily target points should be lower than what I am consuming daily. And I have made my ultimate weight-loss goal to 130 lbs now (and we'll see how low we go from there). According to my height and age, I should be somewhere btwn 113lbs to 140's I believe. So it should be ok. I'm happy that I joined as I'll have a proper tracking system at my disposal ..instead of the diary w/ the not so accurate points. No matter...i'm on the right path and something good came out of this bad situation. And as for the coming week. Only time will tell.


I'll be myself soon!